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I seldom make a major score like this, but when I am able to find a 70’s porn movie with sound, it’s a big deal, but when I also find a magazine layout to go with it, that’s cause for celebration!

I’ve had an old 1970’s magazine called Junior Cadets No. 4 on the site since I first launched it, and I knew I had some 8mm films that went with it. I never got around to transferring the 8mm films, but was certainly on my list. Low and behold, I found a copy of the same movies on VHS, and best of all they have sound! Well, sort of. It’s one of those really tacky voice-over jobs that they did for the theaters.

Those bad voice-over jobs were nothing more than grunts and groans and campy dirty talk added later by guys that weren’t even in the movie. Most times, it sounded like the two guys doing the voice over weren’t even in the same room when they recorded it. Plus, they added copyright free music underneath, which in this case happened to be light and airy jazzy elevator music with flute! (Flutes get me hot and bothered everytime!)

Hey, nobody promised you this site was high art! I think it’s charming to see how porn was presented in the early days. Think of it as a time capsule.

Enough of the boring stuff, here’s what happens in the scene. Apparently, the producer bought a couple military cadet uniforms at the Army Navy Surplus store and dressed up some local twinks in them, even if they had long, un-military haircuts. (Very Justin Bieber.) He snapped a few photos at a movie theater in their uniforms then ran them all back to grandma’s living room to fuck on the couch. (With the rhinestone necklaces in picture frames and crystal knick knacks everywhere, it HAD to be grandma’s house!)

The twinks had a three way, but there were only two voices on the soundtrack oohing and aaahing. Then one said, “Oops, I came too soon.” Pretty funny, but it was the only bit of audio that matched up with the visual!

The guys are all, young, skinny and smooth and one is uncut, so I think there will be some perverted fans that get into this one. See the whole movie in the VIP Room.

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In the arts, you often have to Work With What You Got, and in the case of this magazine called The Cruiser, it appears someone had access to two big props that they wanted to use for a porn shoot. First was an electronic organ, just like the one your grandma had. Why not pose some cute guys on the organ bench slurping each others flesh organs? Why not?

They also had access to a 1964 Cadillac convertible that they used to show the guys “cruising” to put each other up. Two nice props, but I don’t think they used them as effectively as they could have. Join now to see all 70 shots from “The Cruiser” to see if you agree.

The second shot with the mirror tile I included just because it was less porny and more artsy, even though mirror tiles are considered the height of tacky nowadays.

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That floral print couch looks like it belongs to your Grandma. Isn’t that a little creepy seeing to guys fuck on Grandma’s sofa?

Oh, forget about the couch for a moment – how about that “69″?

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Listen closely, children. Yes, there was a time when Mediterranean style furniture was in vogue. I know, hard to believe, but it was. But when you add leopard skin sheets, plaid pillow cases, brocade upholstered chair, clashing cushions and velvet painting… well, I’d say it was time to shoot some gay porn!

Enjoy this example of interior desecration and much, much more in the VIP Room.

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I am so jaded when it comes to porn, I mostly look at things like the bedsheets, clothes and furniture. I especially like the wallpaper in this photo. It makes me hot.

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Here’s the Reader’s Digest version of a movie I just added to the VIP Room called, “Dreamy Brothers”:

One brother is sleeping in the bedroom and the other brings home a trick. The trick and Brother #2 start fooling around on the couch – and what a couch! A really bold plaid pattern surrounded by pictures hung on the wall of rhinestone necklaces and crystal objects covering the coffee table. Hmm. Haven’t we seen that same living room several times before? I suspect we’ll see even more of it!

Anyway, the two start playing around sucking each others cock on the couch and the first brother wakes up, puts on a robe and joins them. Here’s the interesting part: after the first brother gets into the action the scene magically changes to the bedroom! They are suddenly in a bed rather than the couch – and wait till you see that bedroom! The sheets and pillows are total 70’s Pop Art daisies in black and white! Awesome!

The trick soon shoots his load and the brothers see him to the door then go back to finishing each other off. A good time was had by all.

See the whole movie in the VIP Room.

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Where do I begin? The skeleton key mounted on the wall? Velvet tuck-n-roll couch? Harache sandals? Crocheted afghan? Long hair? Silver tea pot? Oh, the humanity!

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New magazine just added to the VIP Room named, “Nutbusters”. Dig that groovy Danish Modern sofa! You will bust a nut, too! Join Now!

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Fans of this site know that I often award “Style Points” to certain photos. There are no rules for what does or does not constitute a Style Point. I’m not keeping track of Style Points and there is no winners or losers. It’s completely arbitrary and I am the sole judge. But I think you would agree that this photo session deserves some sort of recognition, don’t you?

Some of the style elements include:
-beige shag carpet
-longish feathered hair cuts, parted down the middle
-knit shirt with a zipper
-floral print Peter Max style throw pillow

This is only the tip of the iceberg. Perhaps someone might be ambitious enough to count and tabulate all the Style Points I’ve awarded on this blog. Could be a term paper for aspiring designers or students of fashion. You can see the rest in the VIP Room and use your student loan to pay for it.

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This late 1970’s movie starts out with that cliched film technique known as the dreaded “dream sequence”, but if you’re not looking for it, you probably wouldn’t notice.

A tall lanky, brunette is sleeping next to a swimming pool. Cut to a living room with two yummy long-haired twinks sucking cock on a plaid couch (the same plaid couch you’ve seen in a zillion of these 8mm movies!) One has a nice round bubble butt, the other has a really big dick. After a minute of dreaming about these boys, the sleeping guy enters his own dream and joins the twinks on the couch. The dream continues in the bedroom as each sucks and fucks randomly. (I really didn’t keep score of who fucks whom, but it all looks pretty mutual.)

When they all shoot their loads, the original sleeping guy dozes off in the bed and the others exit. Was it a dream? It was certainly dream-y. You can see the whole movie, plus enough pre-condom movies to get your rocks off for months in the VIP Room.

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